'Allo 'Allo!

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After the Colonel makes René promise not to hang out with the Résistance anymore, Herr Flick´s sausage (containing the forgery of the Fallen Madonna) is kidnapped by the Communist Résistance. The Colonel and the Captain are anxious that it doesn´t come out that they have switched the paintings, and order René to come up with the ransom, which Edith gets from Monsieur Alphonse. The ransom is to be left by René and his staff, dressed as German soldiers. But the whole thing is watched by German soldiers dressed as French policemen, the Gestapo dressed as French Résistance girls, and the Colonel and the Captain dressed as trees. And of course, Lieutenant Gruber stumbles upon the meeting, and his dog can´t help but chase the sausage.

The sausage containing the painting of the Fallen Madonna, which was taken by Lieutenant Gruber´s dog, is minced by the Lieutenant - but fortunally he discovers it first and saves it. At the same time, the missing knockwurst means that Monsieur Alphonse cannot get back the money which he leant to pay the ransom of the kidnapped sausage. The résistance pays him back with Monsieur LeClerc´s badly forged money. But after everything seems to getting back to normal, the sausage is sent to Lieutenant Gruber to make another copy. Also, Michelle´s latest plan to get the airmen back is by an old plane with the motor from general von Klinkerhoffen´s lawn-mower.

After Maria is sent to Lieutenant Gruber with the sausage containing the real painting of the Fallen Madonna for copying, she is caught by General von Klinckerhofen, who places the sausage in his wardrobe and helds Maria hostage until his lawn-mover engine is returned by the Résistance. Herr Flick, the Colonel and the Captain, and René hears about this and decides to go to the chateau through the secret passages and steal the sausage from under the General's nose, using Helga, Yvette and Lieutenant Gruber as erotical bait.

With René again in the possession of the sausage containing the painting of the Fallen Madonna, the attention turns to getting the two British airmen out of France. Michelle proposes a steam engine tour through Nouvion. Michelle´s newest hairbrained scheme of getting the airmen out will of course need 80 meters of suspenders, and it's René's job to get them from every Frenchman in Nouvion. Herr Flick and Helga arrive in his staff car to spy on the show.

After the plot to get the two British airmen out failed, a frustrated René returns to the painting of the Fallen Madonna. He hides it behind an ugly painting in his café which is immediately recognized by General von Klinkerhoffen as a Van Gogh and requisitioned for his office in the chateau. He also requistions the two new maids in Café René - or as they are better known: the two British airmen in disguise. Realizing that the two airmen will be recognized right away, Michelle of the Résistance comes up with another hairbrained scheme of digging a tunnel from Monsieur Alphonse's morgue into the prisoner of war camp and smuggling in the two airmen into the camp.

While the Captain is sitting in the café, herr Flick from the Gestapo is listening when René is talking to London on the wireless. He soon cracks the code surrounding the message with the plan to dig a tunnel from the mortuary to hide the British airmen. But it's soon apparent that the two airmen and Monsieur Alphonse need help with the digging, and the café staff are called in, leaving Madame Fanny and LeClerc in the café. But the Colonel and the Captain follow René, discover the tunnel, and are captured in the prisoner of war camp.

Having been trapped in the POW camp, Rene is enlisted in the plan to re-dig the tunnel, by getting rid of the dirt. Hans and the Colonel are playing cricket, though not very well, and Herr Flick and Von Smallhausen are digging their own tunnel into the camp. Monsieur Alphonse arrives at the Cafe to report to Fanny the news that Rene has been captured, but Rene and Company join in on the British prisoners' plan to escape - though only one person can escape in this way. Meanwhile, Helga reports the situation to Gruber, and together they decide on a plan to rescue the Colonel, the Captain, and Rene, involving Gruber dressing as a nun.

Dressed as girls from the Foliés Bergeres, the entire gang (the staff and the Germans) escape from the prisoner of war camp, and completely against plans bring the two British airmen with them. Outside again, the Colonel finds that the Captain is missing, only his glasses are found. Herr Flick and von Smallhousen intercept a message from London and try to send their own message, but René catches on and tosses the radio out the window, which leaves the résistance without a means to contact London, until Michelle thinks of the radio in Lieutenant Gruber´s little tank.

Since Maria´s disappearence, the café needs another waitress, but René and Edith has somewhat different ideas about who should fill the positition, but finally Michelle from the Résistance brings tiny Mimi from another cell, to be René´s bodyguard. In the meantime, General von Klinkerhoffen gives the Colonel a new assistant, Italian liaison Bertorelli.

The Gestapo suspects that the Colonel and the General are in on a plot to assassinate Hitler, so Herr Flick goes undercover as Private Irma Von Kinkenrotten and plants a somewhat bizarre daffodil-shaped microphone in the Colonel's office, where Gruber and Von Strohm are making plans to get rid of Bertorelli in some way. Meanwhile, as Edith prepares for her wedding, Rene & Co. must get the aerial for their new radio above the jamming signal of Herr Flick, so they disguise Mimi as a small nun to obtain a box kite which they fly to contact London and request plastic explosive to blow up the safe in the General's chateau to get the British Invasion plans.

There is still no batteries for the wireless radio underneath the bed of René´s mother in law, so Michelle´s newest hairbrained scheme is to have René and Yvette powering the radio with the generator from a bicycle until the stolen batteries from a German midget submarine are delivered. The Lieutenant is finished copying the paintings (The Fallen Madonna... and the Van Gogh), and delivers them as sausages. Sausages also comes from Captain Bertorelli (real ones), Monsieur LeClerc (submarine batteries), and Officer Crabtree (explosives), and soon they´re all mixed up in the German officers pants.

The Germans arrest René, and the Colonel demands an explanation for the knockwursts with explosives in them. After a small lie, René is sent home with around a dozen knockwursts to hang in his kitchen. The British have sent a spy camera with which the Résistance should be able to photograph the plans for the German invasion of Great Britain, but the camera landed in the vineyard of Monsieur Alphonse´s, and since the Germans commendeered the vineyard, the Résistance cannot go and look for the camera. This problem is solved when the General orders every peasant in Nouvion to work on the vineyard, which also leaves room for some assassination attempts on the General´s life.

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